


As long as you're happy, I'm okay

by Micha319



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: 2am feelings, Acceptance, Angst, Broken Heart, Eventual Happy Ending, Guardian Angels, How Do I Tag, Im scared of posting this lol, Its all about perspective lol, Kihyuk for life, Love Confessions, M/M, Maybe - Freeform, No Dialogue, One Shot, One-Sided Attraction, Sacrifice, Sad Ending, Tags Are Hard, Tags Contain Spoilers, first fic, jk, kihyuk, this is a mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-09-23
Packaged: 2019-07-15 19:46:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16070024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Micha319/pseuds/Micha319
Summary: Kihyun is in love.So does Minhyuk.But he's too busy chasing other guys that he doesn't see his best friend's love for him.Too all the guys they've dated and rejected, they didn't regret their choices.Because sacrifices made are worth it in the end.Because they're happy.





	As long as you're happy, I'm okay

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, this is my first fanfic (to ever be posted) so.. Uh enjoy? Don't mind the tags cause idk how to tag. English isn't really my first language, sorry for any errors or choose of words.

All tears that I wiped, all nights that I stayed up,

all of me I gave away,

it hurted me. 

 

And it still is.

 

 

 

Minhyuk rang the doorbell instead of entering the password. Later to be opened by an inch shorter male, looking concerned rather than asking why his friend didn't just enter like normally since Kihyun did gave his extra key to Minhyuk. 

 

His friend's eyes were red and swollen, hair sticks out in few different directions, face in distress. He asked what's wrong, something happened or anything, but Minhyuk had teared up and was brought into Kihyun's embrace. He had let Minhyuk cry on his shoulder, soaking the fabric with tears. 

 

Once Minhyuk had calm down, he asked again, only to be getting answer that his current boyfriend and him broke up. It shooked him because first love-break ups are always the hardest. So he comforts his best friends in any way he could until Minhyuk's tears dried up and he was laughing along with Kihyun while watching action comedy movie.

 

 

 

One moment you're happy, 

one moment you're not.

 

I don't know whether you're happy when you're with me,

that I did make you feel better after another heart breaks, 

 

Or that you feel happy when you're with somebody else you called yours. 

 

I'm only a shoulder for you to cry on, 

And leave once you're all better.

 

And it's fine.

 

As long as you're happy.

 

 

Not long after his first break ups, Minhyuk was smiling again, Walking while having his hands wrapped around his new boyfriend, Kihyun could only watch from afar. Dumbfounded at how easy he found a new partner. That is not him.

 

 

 

Are you happy though?

 

Why do you keep doing this?

It is as though you know my feelings,

Keep trying to break it.

But yet, you never see me.

 

All the guys that came by,

All the night you've cried,

I was there right by your side,

Comforting you instead of him.

 

 

How could I tell you I love you?

When you were so happy,

With some other guy.

 

 

But a part of me says that you aren't.

I see the way you look at him.

And the way he look at you.

 

 

Another spring passed by and Minhyuk had yet changed another boyfriend, someone who he had longed for. And Kihyun is truly happy for that as Minhyuk had put and show a lot of effort for the guy he had been chasing. Kihyun yet missed another chance to confess to Minhyuk. Minhyuk has been too oblivious, or maybe Kihyun is too scared to let his feelings out.

 

 

 

You deserve someone great,

Not a pathetic coward.

I’m afraid that’s what i am

I am nothing special.

 

 

Minhyuk have been a part of Kihyun's life for such a long time. It was Minhyuk who had saved Kihyun. Minhyuk was Kihyun's first true friend, who he could rely on. And he fell in love with him at some point. But Minhyuk is happy with some other guy. There was no hope, his friend asked Kihyun how does a marriage sound with his boyfriend. Kihyun wanted to say no. But who is he anyway? 

 

Kihyun is nothing more than a close friend for Minhyuk. 

 

I'm terrified of losing you,

because then i’ve lost my life.

 

But your happiness is all i seek

even if it doesn’t include me. 

 

And so here I'll let you go, 

here I'll let you fly.

I watch you disappear, 

never to see again. 

 

I remain here, alone in my thoughts,

searching blindly for the love that I lost,

or perhaps i gave it away. 

 

The sky turns to gray,

memories fade away,

all will be forgotten,

and time will heal the pain. 

 

 

So they say, 

but i can’t forget. 

My heart never filled the place that you fit. 

You’ll be my other half as long as I live. 

I'll just have to find a way to share you with him.

 

But I can't.

 

 

It hurts seeing that all of Minhyuk's time from that moment and onwards will be spending with your one true love. Kihyun had tried letting Minhyuk go, throwing him away. 

 

I thought it would fade away,

But as time pass by,

I still can't move on.

 

All the others I rejected,

Saying I'm not interested,

Already have someone in my mind,

 

All the boys, and girls that gave leave their number on a piece of paper, Kihyun had shredded it nefore throwing it away into the nearest trash can. He doesn't care even if they see it. Not his other half for Kihyun to worry about.

 

You thought I was lying,

To chase the others away.

 

But it's true,

That you're the only one,

That I have in my heart and mind.

 

I kept it inside for so long,

It is begging to be let free,

And so I did.

 

You thought it was a joke,

But you said,

 

You love me too.

 

But

 

 

Platonically.

 

Kihyun tries to distance himself from Minhyuk, and because of how long they've been friends with, Minhyuk notices that his friend is acting differently. So he asked. Kihyun told him to brush it off, but Minhyuk is someone who is persistent and wanted answers.

So Kihyun did. Did he regret it? No. It's what he has been feeling. Something he can't deny. But Minhyuk rejected him, telling him how he felt for Kihyun. 

Nothing more than like a brother.

It crushed Kihyun but he wasn't expecting anything anyway. Just the truth said to his face and sent right through his heart.

 

 

There's no point if you can't love,

So I'll watch you from afar,

Like the coward I am,

 

But at least I know for sure,

That I am able to protect you,

 

All the way from above,

Still hiding from you,

But somewhere in the clouds,

Watching you happy.

Because you deserve the best.

 

Thank you for filling in my empty heart,

For now it became empty yet again,

But you needed it more than me.

 

I love you after all.  

 

:)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. Kudos and comments are much appreciated.
> 
> I wanted it to be a full story but I know if I were to do so, I wouldn't have the courage to actually post it. Like, I have few fics that are 5+ chapters long with dialogue and plot saved in my draft but.... 
> 
> Anyway, this is slightly took off from a poem by someone I know. What I wrote isn't what I experienced. Maybe. ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ


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